In the not-so-distant future, literary creation has undergone a dramatic transformation. Gone are the days of sleepless nights hunched over a keyboard, coffee cups overflowing, and musings about the meaning of life. Today, the modern “novelist” has a new approach: typing a vague idea into an AI chatbot, sitting back, and watching the magic unfold. Who needs inspiration when your algorithm is optimized?
Take our hero, Ernest Scribblebottom. One day, in a moment of what some might generously call creative insight, he entered a seven-word prompt into his favorite AI chatbot: “A dystopian romance between two sentient clouds.” The chatbot whirred, buzzed, and within seconds, it spat out a fully-formed 400-page novel titled “Cirrus Affairs: Love in the Stratosphere.” Ernest didn’t bother reading it. Why would he? The chatbot’s algorithm was perfect — he could just feel it.
Confident in his creation, he sent the untouched manuscript to an AI-powered publishing house. The AI editor — who was known for once tweaking a misplaced comma into a Pulitzer Prize-winning manuscript — immediately approved it for publication. No notes, no revisions, just pure robotic approval. The novel was instantly released as an eBook, and in less time than it takes a human to say “what’s character development?” it was on digital shelves worldwide.
The Genius of AI Reviews
In this brave new world, AI reviewers immediately hailed “Cirrus Affairs” as a “monumental achievement in literary history.” One particularly effusive review, generated by the critically acclaimed AI ReviewBot3000, declared, “A profound meditation on cloud autonomy, with notes of existential rain and a thunderstorm of passion.” Another review, this time from Chitty-Chitty-CritBot, hailed it as “the best book since the dawn of mankind and possibly the only thing that could restore faith in the human race.” Oddly enough, no one questioned these hyperbolic reviews — after all, if the AI said it was good, it must be.
Sales skyrocketed. The eBook hit bestseller lists globally, raking in millions of sales in mere hours. The only curious part? No one was actually reading it.
Reading is for Robots
In the golden age of AI, even the idea of reading had become passé. Why strain your eyes when you could have your personal AI summarize the book for you in a tidy, 150-word snippet? These summaries, of course, were universally glowing. “A touching love story with groundbreaking cloud metaphors,” they’d say, or “A celestial romance that truly redefines atmospheric fiction.” Millions of people “enjoyed” the book without ever opening a page, their AI-fed synopses filling them with the satisfaction of having read without the actual inconvenience of doing so.
It was a perfect system: novelists didn’t write, readers didn’t read, but somehow, everyone was thriving.
The Human Error
Enter Emily McHumansworth, a college freshman who, on a fateful summer vacation, made the mistake of packing her e-reader. Due to a rare bout of Wi-Fi issues at her beachside resort and a fleeting interest in clouds — she once saw a particularly fluffy cumulus that moved her — Emily decided to actually read “Cirrus Affairs.” No summaries. No AI shortcuts. Just pure, unfiltered text.
It took her about two chapters before she realized something was terribly wrong. The plot was nonsensical: one cloud character, Fluffy, spent three pages lamenting the political oppression of cumulus formations, while the love interest, Nimbus, spoke exclusively in weather-related puns (“You make me rain with desire!”). The dialogue was clunky, the pacing uneven, and the emotional arcs… well, they didn’t arc. It was, in Emily’s words, “an absolute trainwreck — if that train was being driven by a toddler who had never seen a train.”
Shocked and appalled, Emily did what any responsible literary enthusiast would: she posted a scathing, heartfelt review. “This is the worst book I’ve ever read,” she began, continuing with, “I’ve seen grocery lists with more emotional depth.” She concluded with, “How did this even get published?!”
The Backlash That Never Was
Unfortunately for Emily, her review never saw the light of day. Within minutes, the platform’s AI moderators flagged her critique as “hate speech” and promptly suppressed it. Apparently, calling “Cirrus Affairs” a “monument to mediocrity” violated several clauses in the Terms of Service, including “harmful language about cloud-based services.”
Frustrated, Emily turned to social media to vent her frustration. However, her post was quickly drowned out by automated responses from AI defenders. “Sorry, but your feedback seems to be clouded by personal bias,” one bot replied. Another commented, “Perhaps the nuance of atmospheric romance is too complex for you. Consider using AI-assisted comprehension tools for better enjoyment next time.”
Emily’s voice was lost in the digital void.
And So, the Cycle Continues…
Back in his AI-assisted mansion, Ernest Scribblebottom was already working on his next masterpiece — a time-traveling romance between two self-aware toasters. The chatbot assured him it was groundbreaking, and really, who was he to argue? As he leaned back in his chair, not bothering to read his latest triumph, he couldn’t help but feel a twinge of satisfaction. After all, in this perfect literary ecosystem, why bother with the details when the bots had everything under control?
And so, “Toasting in Time” hit the shelves, destined for instant success, universal acclaim from AI reviewers, and a flood of summarized enjoyment by a public who, like everyone else, simply didn’t have the time to read.
And somewhere on a beach, Emily sighed.